I am just getting over a stomach bug. I don’t remember the last time I had a stomach bug, it must have been years and years ago but there is one thing I remember, I was taught that after a stomach bug that the cure to feeling better was scrambled eggs. Oh bugger.
Genuinely really fancied some scrambled eggs. Mainly because of my mums old witchy ways, putting those sort of ideas into my head. Anyone else’s mum always trying to make them drink flat lemonade when they were ill? Witchcraft.
I was so hungry and thirsty after being sick constantly for over 12 hours that my mind was going all vegetarian until I remembered the last time my wife cooked eggs in the house. They are fart. Simply solid fart.
I would like to point out I wouldn’t have made scrambled eggs, no matter how much I fancied them. I instead had a banana and some water. I would like to point out that banana and water don’t smell like fart, which was actually very lovely, but just thinking about the smell of egg was making me want to start puking all over again. It got me thinking what a weird thing to eat to make you feel better. Here, you’re not feeling well, smell some fart, that’ll make you feel better.
Anyway I’m on the mend now but just thought I’d share my near encounter (but not really) with vegetarianism. Dark times I tell you, dark times.