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The Vegan Hypocrite.

If you’re house is anything like mine then there is a spider hiding around every corner waiting for you so they can jump out to make you scream. Those sick scumbags! I just want to know why it’s always a spider? Why is it something that loads of people are scared of? Why can’t our homes be infested with kittens? Imagine you’re in your bathroom ready to take a shower, you pull back the curtain and there’s a kitten stuck in the bath. How would you react to that? It would be a pleasure to throw it out the window (before you start I wouldn’t really do that, not after what happened last time (another joke!!)).

All I’m getting at is I don’t want to feel bad towards the spider. I really am trying but my instant reaction is to scream and protect myself! How can I be a vegan and want to treat all animals equally when I’m such a prick to the spider? I sometimes imagine their disappointment as they’re falling out the window that they’re back out in the cold after putting so much effort into the web they’d made indoors (which won’t catch any bugs by the way because the only bugs inside are bloody spiders?).

“Mum get a mug, a kitten’s just crawled out from under the couch!!” That would be amazing.

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